<$BlogRSDUrl$>

Tuesday, October 31, 2006

Getting a Better Job!

Well... Looks like I'm going to find a better job, somewhere else.

Finally I'm able to negotiate pay with my married pair of bosses today.

While I was still vexing my brains over an extremely creativity restraint project task, I'm suddenly called by my female boss to head down to the hotel lobby to meet regarding my full-time employment.

They said they really wanted me to have the first priority to the current job (duh.. like they got a choice..), offered me the fulltime job and basically they asked me whether I liked the job.

I said no, and I told them I simply lacked the motivation to further improve on the quality of my works, but rather, most of the time, I'm just struggling to get my job tasks to complete in terms of quatity, as in doing the changes requested by clients.

I'm just didn't have that heart and interest to take on the job.

The one and only motivation I had hoped they would give and make me stay on for the fulltime job was the pay. I didn't tell them what's my current expected salary now, but I asked them what are they going to offer me.

As they accepted me on this part-time job on the basis that I initially told them through a job agent was $1.5k.. I was thinking of a better and higher pay to match my workload for the full-time job but they never got that idea.

My lady boss kept stressing that I am a fresh and "inexperienced" to a fulltime job like this and I need to learn more, so I'm paid this much according to my experience.

But I'm just wasn't that convinced.

Anyway, I don't find this job prospective at all too. The bosses told me that because they thought I have the potential to be more than what I am (like I don't know I have to?), that's why they chose me than other 20 over applicants. But as far as I know, I am the last applicant and most probably, I got through the part-time job because my expected pay then was lower than the market rate or and, as I am testing water.

And they told me their vision was to train potential designers like me as they did for 12 years?! And its always ONE designer in their house?!

But anyway they didn't offer me a better pay either. So, I decided to reject the job offer and told them I have better job offers elsewhere.

And luckily I rejected the job.

I just discussed this topic with my cousin, who worked in this line for 3 years already. I told him my job scope in a conservative way. But he said I'm working too much workload to just get only $1.5k. Judging that, my cousin estimated my market value for the job was at least $2k!

For now, I'm going to do my freelance job for Linda while continuing working this temporary part-time job, and of course, continue looking for a better job.

; )

Sunday, October 29, 2006

Round-the-Clock Halloween Night!

Had a crazy time for Halloween last night!

I was really having a great time doing activities in one great span of a night. Glad everyone had a great time even though we had only three a crowd.

Fun time started at 9 o' clock last night when we head for KBox at Orchard Cineleisure, where Alex, June and I sang our our best till 1am plus. We even smuggled extra drinks sponsored by June's private alcohol stock.

I must be crazy to go sing KTV even though I had an unusual sore throat. Singing rock songs even made my throat more painful but I didn't care! Haha! I just sing till my voice die.

The cure for the pain is the numbing alcohol. Haha.. Which actually cured the sore throat pain by the end of the night.

After that we headed down to Clarke Quay, where we prepared to finish our last of our own private drink by playing "five-ten" finger guessing game before heading into MoS to party. Managed to make Alex drink alot and June kanna major drinking again. I escaped quite alot of punishment drinks because I'm God-damn-pro in this game (when I'm good that is)!

With June's friend, Azhar, who had big business influence, all of us managed to get in free somehow after a few minor mishaps.

But once we hit the dancefloor, we just danced and have fun.

When June and I got to Azhar's den at the VIP area, June was offered quite an amount of drinks by Azhar and friends. Had to help her drink settle some glasses of thick Martell mixture as she was already pretty high already, after some heavy vodka punishment drinks before we went in MoS.

Don't want to see her feeling badly sloshed again. Or else I heart pain.

What everyone wanted was to get high and be happy. Nothing more, nothing less!

Anyway, after the partying, we all went for a heavy supper.. *Burp!* Clumpsy me spilled a glass of ice milo over myself.

After that, we just chit-chat till dawn.

Went for a short walk across the Esplanade Bridge and took wonderful pictures of the Sunday morning cityscapes. I never felt so good for one tiring fun night!

(^.^)

Friday, October 27, 2006

Restpoint!

TGIF! "Thank God Its Friday!", they say!

Finally reach the weekend even though I only worked for three days. At least this weekend I should have enough time to rest and relax as THERE ARE PROJECTS to WORK over the weekend..

Shit right?

Anyway, suddenly at the end of today, many people were calling me to go out and go for activities tomorrow. But I haven't decide, cos' I'm really tired and I just want to have a good night's sleep tongiht before deciding on anything yet.

These few days I've been having some physical downturns too.

From headaches, sore throat, coughing, pimples, shoulder aches and even rashes.



Rashes!



What the hell? What strange combo of symptoms for weird sickness is this?!

~~~~~

Anyway, I did finally have a really relaxing lunch alone today, at my favourite outdoor cafe spot, Coffee Bean & Tea Leaf outside Wheelock Place.

Had some nice pasta with iced mocha, while watching the "urban chicken" (aka pigeons) walking around like cock lidat. Haha. Even the many foreigners sitting at other tables find the birds amusing.

Thursday, October 26, 2006

Being Positive.

Didn't really have a smooth day today. But I'm not feeling bad, I'm feeling positive.

Guess, I'm getting used to the stress. Though a few "shit" words still came out of my mouth automatically. Haha.

Being a solo stressful designer made me learn things in a short time span and make me look and discover for solutions on my own at a faster pace. Maybe this job is a good training ground for the real shit of working ultimate freelance designer on my own.

Actually, long-term whining doesn't really help much except making a person more unmotivated. Reflecting oneself is the permananent solution leading to motivation and future success.

Well, today, one of my proposed design concepts didn't went through the client's vetting. Though initially I was a bit upset, thinking that it was a breakthrough design after cracking my brains for 2 days during the long weekend, but as I am always a logical person, I decided to ask the client what's wrong with my design through my boss's encouragement.

But the response was pretty bad from the client. As the client was more focused on the mistakes of the unstated do-nots against the corporate guidelines, I couldn't get a professional response even though I tried to get feedback professionally. Maybe I did accidentally upset her by saying the old poster design was "simple" (but I didn't she design that old poster!).

Bad luck I guess. Better luck next time I hope.

Met Junlong, my ex-downline, who is a rookie insurance agent now for a short meet after work to catch up our on-goings even though I'm very tired. I am just giving a chance by lending some support by listening to him.

I already predicted beforehand what he's going to do. But anyway, we had a wonderful chat. I gave him 70 marks out of 100 for his professional appointment. He did not made me uncomfortable. Hope he worked hard.

Anyway, got to continue some work again now. This secondary client is really bugging me, that's why I really needed to settle her job. I don't want to hear her voice and see her emails again.

That's what motivating me. LOL.

(X.x) Overworking!

My sweet girl is exhausted too.. Hope she will endure through her last working day today before she take a break again..

As for me, if you can see. I'm worked up 5.30am just to complete some really bugging work.

~~~~~

I am not stopping to rest much either. My work never got out of my head and everyday I have to face them.. So sickening..

And when I meant overworking, it does mean I'm not overworked. Its not past tense because I'm still working.

Yesterday, I have worked till my creative brain juices dry. Nothing new pop out except trying to survive. So sickening it is.. This is especially so when I am currently taking only part-time pay, which is unmotivational.

Not say I really want this to be my permanent full-time job as I am still considering. Long working hours, poorly paid by market standards or even work-to-pay rate standards, whether this job would become any much more permanent will also depends on the full-time pay they are giving me.

Or else this job will be just another stepping tombstone. *ENDURE!*

* Just finished my work. I must be crazy, switching on some hip-hop R&B music and dancing now.. Well, morning exercise I guess.

Tuesday, October 24, 2006

Dim-Sum Session Update.

Well, its around noon now and I just got back home getting a ride from my Malaysian uncle.

The dim-sum session was not too bad. A lot of people were there, of family and friends. My dad had reserved three tables at a restaurant in Chinatown, near my old home, where I lived there for the first few months I was born. Hah.

But I didn't really walk between tables to grab food or chat with my relatives much..

Feeling kind of unwell since yesterday when I got my sore throat.. Hope its not an infection, or I'll most probably get a fever. I think I better get some rest now.

This is not the best time to fall sick when I still have much work to be done.. Not to mention I may go out later.

Taking a rest now.. Out.

Late Nites Working.

Damn. I have to wake up early today, even though today's a holiday. Meeting alot of people this morning, which included my parents' friends and extended family from both sides of my parents.

Wonder why they have to make it such a "big" event. And I wonder why they have to make it a morning dim-sum session.

I want to sleep! Argh..

My working and sleeping schedules are really screwed up. Feeling that 24 hours ain't enough. Late nights almost every night at 2am at least since don't know when. It seems that time travels faster than I can complete my work.

Not to mention the current projects I'm working on have really rigid guidelines. Very hard to get some creative breakthroughs if I have to follow those stupid, mathematical rigid corporate guidelines.

Well, nothing to whine about actually. Its the crazy life of any creative person in this industry.

But yesterday was really "bo hua". Have to work at home cos' office is closed. This also meant I have no pay for yesterday..

My bosses are coming with some signs of bad cunning patterns of an ugly boss. Looks like its time to fight for some worker rights. Time to send their feet dancing on some hotpan.

This will be especially so if I going working full-time. If my future full-time pay is not satisfactory for my overloaded work, think they have to prepare for the worst, find yourself another super-designer.

Say NO to creative slavery.

Think my industry should have some union or something man.

Monday, October 23, 2006

Love in a New Wave
By Electrico



I never get to see your face
I only get to hear your drums instead
You never fail to make me feel all right
When it come to consequence
You make feel like I got no regrets
You never fail to make me feel so right

Your synthesizes to the bone
They lift off my legs of stone
And all I need is close my eyes
We’re making love in new wave tonight

You take me places I never been
Like a cover of a magazine
I never thought I’d get there all my life
Crazy though it all may seem
Every pages of this magazine
There’s not a word about you all the time

Your synthesizes to the bone
They lift off my legs of stone
And all I need is close my eyes
We’re making love in new wave

Whatever that turns you now
Whatever that turns you now
Whatever that turns you now
Whatever that turns you now

We’re making love in new wave
We’re making love in new wave
I say we’re making love in new wave
We’re making love in new wave

Sunday, October 22, 2006

Jeanetics.

I felt so much better saying my heart out.

I'm fine now : )

Been on an emo rollercoaster. Just been silly thinking too much.

But I'm still standing one piece. Are YOU ready for me?!

~~~~~

Speaking of one piece, I almost forgot to show my new jeans I copped a few days ago.

It is a Levis' Silver Tab Premium Jeans, straight and slim, the best fitting for me.



Love the patterns in the jeans, which most probably wouldn't be seen it once I wear it on. The feature I really love is the foldings at the butt pockets, which will be cool when I put my hands in in. It'll definitely remind me not to put my fat wallet there and make a lobang out of it ever again.

Also got the Levis' Club membership and a nice Levis' key chain which I really like for the buy.

Still, gotta get it tailored to my waist size miss by an inch and also the length.

Can't wait to wear it on my ass.

Heartbroken Fools on Abscondence..

Went out for dinner with Zane today, who was got her own answer that she wanted to ask.

Sadly, Uncle Agony got his heart shattered by getting his own answer via a message while he was working on relieving people's agony..

It hurts. But he could only bear with his own pain, he knew he'll just break down if he doesn't hold on.

Anyway, both of us went for a dinner at Changing Appetites to feed ourselves silly with fine gourmet dishes while we chatted on the most mundane issues forget unhappiness.

After that, we went for a walk to the Esplanades, my favourite spot when I'm feeling like shit. Wonder God has planned this for me, the 365th day timing and the place that make me better when I'm feeling down.





And so, Zane and I bumped into the Dan:s Festival, which is a festival of dances and music.

We stopped a while while walking to the outdoors to listen to some really nice jazzy music.



We were wondering whether to go some club to dance our asses off, our fav form of brainwash. But instead, we went into a dancing marathon held on the festival itself.

And for one hour, we danced our best below outdoor concert stage on our fav hip-hop music like we would dance in our clubs. We danced and sweat.. And we sweat like we went through sauna, so that we can forget of our foolishness.



After the dance, both of us went our own ways home via cabs.

I was on the verge.. Trying to hold back the tears when I was in the cab.

But stupid taxi uncle, talking to me about my girlfriend SMSing me when it was just my colleague asking me out to club. I feel like scolding him.. *Fuck*

I danced till my both thighs cramped when I got off the cab.

But I'm just too tired.. I just want to sleep and make my pillow wet.

多想化成隱形的人
掩飾我傷痕
給你 我的體溫
好幫你驅走寒冷
看不見也能 感受心疼
我想化成隱形的人
隱藏我的淚在翻滾
我在你淩亂世界
留下的指紋
對你是沒心跳的一個吻
朋友都於心不忍
責備我愚蠢

Saturday, October 21, 2006

Mind Blank.

Went clubbing yesterday with Eddie, Weiwei and Chee Keong at Phuture yesterday..

But I didn't know what to do there also, my mind was blank. I was tired after a long day of work; major hand-over of project works from the outgoing designer, teaching someone to 3DMAX, buy my new Levis' Silver Tab Premium jeans and other stuff happens..

I was dancing the way I was at the club's dance floor, but my soul was just not there. I felt so unhappening and not fun, except only for a few moments. Everything was just not right at the club.

The music sucks, kept jumping alternatively from reggae, hip-hop R&B, reggae, hip-hop R&B etc..

The crowd is too packed. I can't even dance alone on my own properly. While my friends were either dancing with their own friends or just looking for girls..

I was also in an anti-social mood. So I didn't bother, I just danced on my own.

After a few hours, I got very sian and I went out of the club alone, walked to the beautiful bridge and sat there quietly.. But with nothing to do there and my mind was a complete blank, without a meaning, meaningless, I just went home.

I left taking a cab. I just abandoned Eddie without sharing a cab with him. But I did gave him chances by SMSing him that I am going off and whether he wanted to go of with me or not. But he didn't wanted to go.

Didn't even care to say my goodbyes to my friends face-to-face, just ain't in the mood, so I just left.

So I just left taking a cab home and just go to sleep.

Friday, October 20, 2006

:|

"如果我爱一个人, 我就给她自由地飞。。。"

: |

But I'm not exactly happy rite now.. I had this feeling of being "abandoned"..

我 有点乱 有点慌..

Hate this feeling inside me.. But what to do..?

As long as she's happy bah.

: )

對你有感覺
By 江美琪 + 光良



我曾深刻體會 對愛感到膽怯
還好有懂我的你 給我安慰

看你失落的臉 又再為愛憔悴
我心痛的感覺竟 如此的強烈

眼角的淚 它給過誰
傷透了心 也無所謂
我會願意 靜靜地 陪在你身邊

如果說愛 已不可為
那我寧願 藏心裡面
其實我害怕會失去你的感覺

怎麼會開始對你有了感覺
又深怕朋友默契轉身不見
矛盾著猶豫不決
沒準備 跨越愛的界線

怎麼會開始對你(妳)有了感覺
深陷朋友戀人之間的危險
進與退 被愛包圍 誰犯規 都狼狽
誰能解圍 讓一切完美

怎麼會開始對你(妳)有了感覺
深陷朋友戀人之間的危險
你和我 擁抱瞬間 不後悔 這曖昧
星光唯美 把愛放心裡面

Thursday, October 19, 2006

Bad Eyes Dayz!

Three nights. That's how many days of over-time working at home for the past few days ever since start of my current job.

I'm tired.. as I'm not having enough sleep and rest. My brain performance has dropped today I realised.

Think I might need to take a good rest tonight. Or would I have a sudden gush of workaholism?! I hope not.



Popping OUT!



Speaking about eyes issues. My newly met and relatively talkative administration assistant, Sun, colleague has been telling me I'm not taking care of my eyes, as I got wrinkles.

By the way, with Sun's "over-fashionalised" make-up and wear, I know she's the kind of person who loves to be pretty.

(June was thinking that I "sian" her? No way! I'm not even that kind of guy who "sian" girls.)

Anyway, I don't care too much about wrinkles, cos' I wanted to look more "mature", as I always though I looked a bit too young for my age.

~~~~~

Yesterday, Wednesday evening. Went to hang out for a short chill meet with my army buddies, Alex and Eddie, who are all working in the vicinity of the CBD area.

We met up in Bugis and had a great chat on our job going-ons.

The good news I heard is that Alex has patched up with his previous girlfriend.

Other than that, nothing is unusual, the usual is Eddie, who is always on a look-out for pretty girls...

Wednesday, October 18, 2006

Sunny Orchard.



Bright, sunny at the Orchard today, for once in the hazy season.

But I am too tired to tell you more..

I'm going to ZzZzZzzz..

Tuesday, October 17, 2006

Tired.. But Happy : )

Hello people! I feel so happy that I want to tell the whole world!

: )

Haha. Perhaps I'm overworked already but I'm still HAPPY!

Got my interview for my part-time job yesterday and I was immediately employed and set off to work! The bosses liked my portfolio and wanted me to start ASAP to get me adapted to my new working environment and process.

For the first day, I had to bring work home already.. Cos' they don't have a workstation for me yet. The workstation and position that I was suppose to take-over is still being used by a staff who's still working on most of the running projects.

I quickly took my own initiative to learn as much as possible. But I did have owrk to do, at times when my male boss, Edwyn, was not using his lappy for his work, I'll be using it to start off some new projects.

The female boss, Sandy, who is also the "mama" of the company and wife of Edwyn, is particularly nice in worker's welfare I say. When she heard I got only $6 per hour from the recruitment firm which recommended this job, she immediately increased my pay through the agency and made sure I get my market value.

Its a small company, but its willing to pay. It only meant two things.

One, the company earns lots of money. Two, and I'm basically the only person to work on the design projects, manage my projects, coordinate with clients and print suppliers and such (and of course, with a little help for Edwyn, but he does all the higher-level of management, coordination and clinching of the project sales.

I'm going to most probably have lots of work and "die" over it.

But I don't care my sufferings, I just wanna work hard and make my money. Cos' its the high pay I ask for, I must be willing to work for it. And if I'm able to handle the work all by myself, I'll be hired as a full-time staff.

The only problem is, I have no one to learn from (Edwyn is much more of a businessman, but the doing know-how he knew little), I had to learn everything by myself!

So wish me luck.

Anyway, the most happiest thing that happened yesterday is actually to see June and get to talk to her face-to-face after I went off work. Never seen her face "live" for a month already.

But the girl's still sick.. Hope she get better soon : |

So many things to tell but I have so little time.

Still got work to do : |

And I feel like sleeping already..

Monday, October 16, 2006

Discovery Weekend!

Finally a nice weekend I had since don't know when.

I can say this weekend is a period of discovering new things and new people. Made quite a few new friends, surprisingly, all older than me. Ha ha.

Saturday. I was invited to my first mahjong circle friend's baby girl's one month old anniversary celebration.

The baby girl's really cute! (^_^)
And I hope she'll grow up to be beautiful and intelligent.

After have some food, most of the time I was watching people play mahjong.

The most interesting part was actually chatting with some old acquaintances of the second mahjong circle, which I played with them last time. We had plenty to talk about. And it was really interesting learning experiences from them.

Sunday. I really don't know what to do today actually.

Its like I've been released from some "jail" after being "locked up" by my financial constraints for a few torturous weeks. I did not feel my old self as comfortable as before trying to ask people out to have some activities.

Maybe becos' I already knew I was late in doing so, as most would have dates, appointments or even work.

But still I managed to go out with my friends, Elvin and Chang Xin, where we visited and explored the newly opened mall, VivoCity. The place was certainly crowded with curious families, clusters of friends and couples.



Nice view. Bad haze.



The most interesting place to visit in the mall, which I also knew and have recommended to my guys is really the mall's roof terrance, which have many weird sculptures, with an amphitheatre, funny playground playthings, playground fountain and it even have a wading pool there!

It was a nice experience and fun.

*Photos to be updated!*

But sadly, I had to leave early for my movie outing with Vel and Joe.

Which I was also bloody late for about 40 minutes plus..

We were watching the Japanese movie "The Death Note", in which the story is based on a manga. Although I was late, I still like the film as I watched. I would want to watch it again if I have the chance..

Anyway, after the movie, we went for a buffet dinner at Joaquim. The place really have very nice food. Even though I had worked at the Suntec Convention Centre for two weeks before, I never really had the chance to dine at Joaquim.

I love the salmon sashimi there.



Food!



The meal was certainly very filling and I didn't know Joe could eat so much!

After dinner, we even went to a chocolate bar at Esplanade Theatre for dessert.

The place is really nice and so are the chocolate dishes. I will definitely visit the place again to check out more for my choco sweet tooth.

After that, we went to the arcade centre at Marina Square. But I was pretty tired already. I guess it was the food. Makes me want to sleep..

Really have to thank Joe for the treat. It really made me more assured that Vel made her right choice and Joe is taking good care of her : )

Well, gotta sleep..

My eyes are multi eyelids..

Don't wanna be late for my job interview tomorrow morning : )

Saturday, October 14, 2006

Run!

Yes! I just completed my morning run, to take off some things of my mind.

I need some answers but seem God's not giving any..

Its been days since my last run. Obviously its not very good as I felt "off seasoned" already during my short run. Not a good sign if I'm going for a marathon.

But from now, I'm not going stop running, just like I'm not going to stop loving..

For run lovers, they say, love is like running a marathon.

For the initial run, you will have plenty of energy and spur, your heart will pump fast, you'll feel the exhilaration of the adrenaline in your body. Its just like the initial feeling when you love, fast, furious or very sweet.

But after some time, you'll start to wear down. For runners, there's something called the "stig" and it can be really painful during the run. And just like love, loving someone can be sometimes painful in the process.

And the solution to the pain?

Don't stop running, don't stop loving.

Cos' if you stop, you'll most probably give up. And you'll never reach the end you want. Love too is the same.

Its okay to take a "rest", as in you can slow down, jog and even walk. But most probably you'll take some more time to reach the ultimate finishing line.

In anyway, I don't want to stop running.

Just like what I do, bite the pain through all the way till I finish my love race.

第六感
by 孫燕姿

感情的事沒有絕對
後來該由自己體會

浪費眼淚
不如乾脆早點作好心理準備
我想跟隨自己的第六感
說不定下次運氣會好轉
我相信簡單
我相信偶然
相信直覺會有答案
我想真愛應該不會太難
否則世界就不會有圓滿
辛福的指環
在誰的手上
等她給我預感
等她給我預感

跟隨著第六感

管她受傷是為了誰
過去丟了也無所謂

忙著後悔
不如乾脆早點
作好心理準備
我想跟隨自己的第六感
說不定下一次運氣會好轉
我相信簡單
我相信偶然
相信直覺會有答案
我想真愛應該不會太難
否則世界就不會有圓滿
辛福的指環
我想真愛應該不會太難
否則世界就不會有圓滿
辛福的指環
在誰的手上
跟隨著第六感
跟隨著第六感 ya

Friday, October 13, 2006

Found Some Job!

Finally, I found some job related to my field of design work.

Just went for an extremely short interview on the part-time graphic designer job.

Initially, I was just trying out and applying this job as a temporary part-time basis, but it became known to me that the employer might be hiring me for full time if I'm good.

The expected salary for the part time was as much as I expected, pretty much like an intern's pay. I rather be treated like a professional in terms of pay for Christ's sake!

If employer doesn't count freelance experience as work-related experience, then they might as well don't look at my professional diploma. Its actually harder to work as a freelancer, cos' you have to be part of a project team withing a short period of time. Anyway, I know they needed people to work in a team. But I don't see that much major relation to one's pay in regard to their professionalism. Professionalism is on big package, which team-work ectos is just one factor.

But anyway... I don't think I have much choice either, even though its part-time. The part-time rate is just "bo hua" by rate in accordance to my professionalism.

Well, I just got to get some job so I don't have to become a permanent homeaker soon, instead of my mother.

At least the job is located in the big town of Orchard which I really like. Cos' from there, I could go any places after work from the central area.

Hope I get through the interview on next Monday : )

Thursday, October 12, 2006

Unsatisfying Town Trip.. Again..

My mood isn’t that stable.

Think if anything just happen I’ll just cry, laugh and become angry for no good reason..

Anyway, I went to town today again, this time is to meet Vel.

I do miss my cousin, because I didn’t see her quite some time already, even online.

But she couldn’t beat the other person I missed, of cos’.

Although Vel knew what I am thinking and what I am going through, I guess she’s just tired from work and was not able to listen to me. Or maybe its becos’ I didn’t know what to do in town, which might have bored her. But I’m sorry; I’m not really in that good mood too. But I hope she understands.

~~~~~

Anyway, I went to accompany her to shop around at the Heeren Orchard, she got some nice Tsarist Russian-looking coat and a pair of earrings.When it’s my turn to shop, I just felt lost, even when I finally got some money in hands now.

Cos’ I know I had to be a bit more thrift to prevent myself from falling into a hellish finance situation again in the near future.

I just wasn’t in the mood to shop..

But then, I decided to visit newly opened Levi’s flagship store. As I always wanted a pair of new jeans, so I decided to take a look and spoil myself just this once. Looking at my poor 524 straight-cut jeans I was wearing with a “lobang” at my wallet pocket did remind me, yet it made me have a dilemmatic irony that its “a hole in the wallet pocket”.

But I did find something I like, and I didn’t care about the price.

It’s a pair of dark-coloured indigo Silver Tab straight jeans. I really like it, as it matches my style. But sadly, it didn’t have my waist size..

And I always have problems getting things I wanted, especially with shoe and pants wear.

I was a bit disappointed. I didn’t buy it then.

But I do want to buy it. But before that, I decided to go home first and experiment sewing down the waist size of my another pair of jeans which I have at home which also go the same problem (but it was less serious, I could wear it with a belt). I will learn the sewing skills from my mum, so I could do it on that Silver Tab jeans when I get it in the near future.

Vel excitedly told me she saw Fann Wong and Andrea de Cruz shopping at the flagship store too.

But I wasn't surprised. Fann's having some relationship troubles too, according to the tabloids. And she's an Aquarian too.

Then after the shopping, we had our afternoon tea at the Coffee Club in Takashimaya Shopping Centre. I ordered some nice chicken pie, which was the best chicken pie I ate among all the coffee places, and a glass of strawberry smoothie. Vel ordered mushroom crepe, which was nice too.

After that, Vel and I went our separate ways. She had another meeting with her friends.

I didn’t wanted to go home as I went all the way from home to town, which was pretty much, a short time. So I decided to walk the town on my own, even though I didn’t know where to go..

Imagine I walked all the way to Plaza Singapura’s ATM to settle all my buddies’ pay which I was holding on to, then walked all the way back to Wisma Atria. I went to Sony Gallery to see if I could get a replacement for my remote controller for my CD player, which was screwed up already.

But they didn’t have stock, worse still; it’ll cost me $120 plus to get a new one. Siao!

Unfortunately anyway, I think my CD player is also going a bit cranky too..

Haiz.. Think its time to get a new music player?

Anyway, at least I did get something from the town trip today, a new pair of retractable headphones, for the purpose of using it during my marathon running trainings.




Cool or not?


Wednesday, October 11, 2006

I Want to Know..

I may not know. But I want to know.

What or who you are missing in your life.

I hope whoever he is, it is me..

If not, I'll still wait for you like a fool..

Just like another fool, who says, "I dunno".

Whatever happen, I just want you to be happy.

Cos' happiness is the only thing I can truely give..

Tuesday, October 10, 2006

I Dunno.. And Where Is My "Fly Away"?

Crap! I think I just join the "I dunno.." club like Zane.

What is the "I dunno.." club?

Well, simply to explain its a bunch of people who don't have answers and there's something unknown to them but they really need to know for their hearts' sakes!

Zane started this "I dunno" on her personal message in MSN, becos' she like someone (not me of cos', I got different focus) but have no answer from that dude..

Now, I'm putting it too, cos' I just came back home and saw some thing online..

I was suppose to behave "normally" and "naturally", but now..

Is it me..?

"I dunno.."!

~~~~~

I went to town today, during the evening time.

But before I go to town and get my idol's newest compilation album, I went to Tuas to get my bloody pay for my IMF job.

Getting my pay, I was pretty angry in my heart.

Cos' whatever small promises made by the project manager like OT pay, meal allowances for Chee Wee and my friends went to null.

Worse, its after I made it clear everything over multiple e-mails and phone calls.

I had enough. So I decided to just take and go. Too pek chek to talk to that fella.

He even called me to get people to work for him in the future.. Siao!

Anyway, my mood wasn't that much good after that.

But still I went to town for a walk, this time in detailed watch of window shopping.

Went to browse for some shoes for June, before I went for my dinner crunch of Iced Milo becos' I was starting to get hungry but was planning to go home eat my dinner.

Then I got my Stefanie Sun's "My Story, Your Song" Compilation Album at the HMV's.



But I didn't find Corrinne May's "Fly Away" and one of Lisa Ono's serial albums, volume 3.

Speaking of that, Lisa Ono's coming to Singapore for her Jambalaya Concert!

I'm not going to miss that!

At Peace.

Haiz, what a wonderful night.

Moon glows bright above my windows, which I can see while I sleep..

Feeling so at peace. Feel so good not thinking about my problems.

Being less focused on her, so I don't lost myself.. Be focused on yourself.

I rather find people who can gave me the comfort when I truely I needed it..

Who really cares about me?

I'm not going to judge, cos' everyone have their own reasons, which I always must, will and have to understand. Cos' its not fair to just judge when someone I care didn't give me the care or support in return when I needed most.

I'm just not a selfish person. I rather get myself hurt. I'm so dumb.. eh?

All I know is when I need someone's care and help there are people there for me.

Its good enough.

Andrew Shen's "Thousand Sky" music from his blog really made me one level up more peaceful. Recommended to listen.

Monday, October 09, 2006

Home Studio: Step One

I was out today, on mission to find back my lost digital video and visual effects portfolio works done during my polytechnic days.

I went to meet up with Shian, my good friend made in poly-days and he is my 3D animation "shifu". We met up for lunch and had our great chat relating to our fields of work of past, present and future. After that we went for a walk around the town.

I sure miss the big town, went to see some kicks at the usual places, but no cigar. Anyway, no money to buy anything anyway : )

But the mission of the day ain't about shopping, its about making my own small, working studio at home and getting back my old portfolio works.

Some of my video portfolio works were accidentally wiped out when my sis accidentally formatted my ex-computer last time..

But luckily, I got a friend, whom we called "The Source", for a very good reason.

Simply because he got a database of most of all our polytechnic animations and motion video works of almost everyone in my course batch.

And he sure didn't let me down : ) I found my works with him even its after two years.

Thank you, Syaz!

Along with Shian, we went to visit Syazali, "The Source", for some of our old works and got some technical assisting softwares to create both our own personal multimedia studios right at home with our very own new compies.

We also viewed some of the other works done by us or someone else to reminise our fun yet sometimes lame days during our poly-days.

Here's a frame capture of Ginette the lead singer in "Snowflake" music draft video.



I still remember, I called it "Cornflake" becos' my team members were often called "squirrels" by our investing producer.



It is a music video visual effects draft done by my final year project team of the famous local band, Astreal, for one of their singles, "Snowflake", from their second album "Fragments of the Same Dead Star" released this year.

I also finally visit Shian's house again after 5 years.

It was great just talking to my good friend about our past and our dreams : )

Sunday, October 08, 2006

夢想天空
by 孫燕姿



一天有多长
是不是无所谓混着过
像大人的世界
ho~我渴望不同的时空
孤单也洒脱
你会懂我离开的理由
在年轻的时候
是否能跟着希望向前走
世界太纷乱
而我在追求自己的战场
生命的极限勇敢的意义
我不想太多努力去突破
迎着风就想飞~~
梦想天空如此辽阔
for ragnarok
或许太天真
相信新世界会有一天出现
经过了考验曾沮丧可哭泣
最真的笑容才能看见
梦想天空如此辽阔
for ragnarok
梦想升空心也自由
for ragnarok
梦想天空没有界限...

Music x Work-Out Therapy.

Now that my mood has normalised,

I am back to doing my hobbies to keep my mind off the troubled waters.

Maybe if you want, you can see it as a moment of escapism.

Becos' I have no choice, the time for solutions to my problems haven't arrived yet. So no point whining and worrying about all the things I can solve for now.

Meanwhile, I can only listen to my favourite songs, play them on my keyboard and just sing my time out. Motivate myself.

Also, after yesterday's part-time work, I realised my upper body strength is losing. So now I'm going to maintain through dance workout and weights training.

The blue skies are back again : )

Finally no more haze.

Weird, sometimes my fate is like intertwined with the weather. Funny..

"Oh. Whatever. Come on Jeff pursue your dreams, then you'll be really free."

: )

I'm Cheered Up.

Well, you know human moods.. Up and down really fast.

Thanks to June for cheering me up in the most argumentitive ways : )

I thank my friend Zane also for being my Aunt Agony for the days before.

Saturday, October 07, 2006

:( Was Sad... Still A Little Bit Sad...

Was sad yesterday..

I'm a still a little bit sad today..

I'm so tired.. disappointed and just plain upset..

Can't someone understand?

I'm a man with nothing. I want to give more to someone but I can't and it sucks!

Got Out and Have Some Fun, Finally.

Finally got out and have some fun today.

Well, not exactly, on the fun part. But it just feels good to interact with my friends.

For some time I haven't been meeting out with my good friends to talk about stuff one-on-on live. Maybe we're just all too busy.

We had some talks over our drinks (not alcohol), and we got to LAN game together and just to laugh. It really feels great.

Make me forget about the mounting finance problems are causing other problems I have for myself. And if you all don't know about it. Its really pressing me hard.

Finding a job would solve all of my problems.

I'm really trying my best to find a job. But if I find a job that makes me unhappy like I am now, then what's the point of finding a job to solve all the problems that make me unhappy the first place?

Anyway, got to go sleep already... Tomorrow I got to work for some part-time job.

No choice. I'm really tight on my belt. Gotta work somehow.

Thursday, October 05, 2006

"Mono"media Job.

Have you ever heard of "mono"media?

I bet everyone has heard of multimedia but definite not "mono"media.

But it seems that the job I applied for and was interviewed today is a "mono"media position, instead of the multimedia position the company was stating..

Let me go through the job scope and let you decide whether the job is "mono".

As you know, most multmedia designers have a lot of creative work area to play with.

But this job, basically your product outcome is the display of a typical car audio sysstem, it is basically displayed 5cm by 10cm screen. Generally speaking, that isn't the problem cos' a namecard design is even smaller.

So let's go to the next "mono" factor.

Imagine you are a designer, but you only have one colour scale to play with.

Next, the worst design constraint of all, you only work with text and numbers. And there's no such think as font. Cos' basically your font is basically the "digital" digits (yes, font like those found on your typical calculator generation-one LCD screen) or letters constrained by the fact that you're limited to a mere few digits, maybe at most up to twelve digits.

And let me stressed again, the LCD is NOT coloured pixel LCD, its LCD that is of a digital calculator!

And the most interesting thing?

Animate those digits going left, right, up, down, flash, blink, fade and other simple transitions.

Amazing?

Yah, not to mention there are more technical specifications that can further constrain the way you animate those digits.

So you can be creative at this job?

I don't think so.

Its just too "challenging" or unchallenging for me. I simply don't know how to say about it.

That's why, I kinda "rejected" the job at the interview by telling that its not very interesting to me.

I think I can find a more normal multimedia job..

Tuesday, October 03, 2006

I Got My Pinky.

Yes, I'm finally and officially a NSmen and officially reinstated as a civilian.

Today I went back to Pulau Tekong with a couple of friends to get our pink identification cards (ICs).

But before that, I was suppose to meet June to give her some stuff, but the poor girl was sick. So I had to deliver the stuff to her door-step without knowing exactly knowing which unit she lived.

Luckiy, her dog, Gracey barked and I knew where she was.

But as she was kinda ill and sleepy, and I wanted her to rest well. I just passed the stuff to her dad.

Hope she gets well soon :|

Anyway, as usual the administration and the communication time lapse in the working offices of the SAF caused some waste of time...

When we were waiting, our pink ICs actually were just right beside us inside a locked metal document cabinet.

And one hour we waited.

When we finally got our pink ICs, we all got excited. Even I who was normally non-chalant on this (well, we WILL get our pink ICs one fine day!) was also influenced by my fellow friend's excitement.

But the trip back to Pulau Tekong was the best gift.

It's like, "Oh... We're back here again." It made all of us reminised the days we started our greens.

And we even made fun of the statements made at the entrance to Tekong. I forgot what's the exact statement but it goes something like this.

"The things you left behind are for the things you gain ahead."

Its BULLSHIT when you go into NSF, good one when you get out of it.

Everyone agreed on the spot.

LOL. ORDed LOH!

The trip to Pulau Tekong was long and tiring... still I'm happy I got my pinky.

Sunday, October 01, 2006

雨天
by 孫燕姿



站在十字路的交点,
该怎么走,我只想回头,
除了你给的伞,我再也没有,
别的借口,去拥有你的什么。
你能体谅,我有雨天,
偶尔胆怯,你都了解,
过去那些大雨落下的瞬间,
我突然发现,谁能体谅,
我的雨天,所以情愿,
回你身边,此刻脚步,
会慢一些,如此坚决,
你却越来越远。
牵手和分手来自同一双手,
做回朋友,我却为何不懂挽留,
你能体谅,我有雨天,偶尔胆怯,
你都了解,过去那些大雨落下的瞬间,
我突然发现,谁能体谅,我的雨天,
所以情愿,回你身边,此刻脚步,
会慢一些,如此坚决,你却越来越远。
是否太晚,路已走远,我的眼眶泪太满,
走不回你身边。你能体谅,我有雨天,
偶尔胆怯,你都了解,
过去那些大雨落下的瞬间,
我突然发现,谁能体谅,
我的雨天,此刻脚步,
会慢一些,如此坚决,
你却越来越远。