A Birthday Surprise.

Today is Vel's birthday, so Joe and I thought of giving her a surprise, a small celebration of a buffet dinner for her at the Coffee Lounge restaurant at Goodwood Park Hotel.





We bought her gifts and the cake she always wanted.

As long as my cousin is happy. I'm happy for her also.

After the dinner, we all went to watch the movie "Babel", which is very nice, recommended to watch if you like movie with nice stories.

~~~~~

Tired.. Tomorrow still have to become a photographer to shoot the professional photographer, Andrew Shen.

Stress man. I'm no pro camera man, and I wonder why I was picked to become his photographer :P

Flying East, East, East!

It has been a busy day. I've been chionging east side places from the early afternoon.

First stop, was to fetch a cake from a cake shop at Simei's Eastpoint shopping mall.

(Stupid first move. A cake in my hand without refrigeration is obviously stupid. I was worried about the cake.)

The second stop was to head for June's house in Tampines and I simply left the stuff I borrowed on her house's doorstep. Cos' I know she's sick again and I assumed she would be sleeping. Hope she'll take care. (And I also don't know why everytime I go her house, she's sick one.)

The third stop was suppose to be visiting Linda and her cute pet doggy Kookee in Pasir Ris. But too bad, I didn't go for this stop becos' Linda couldn't reach home in time.

I really want to see her cute, brown English Spaniel. And its been quite some time I last saw Linda. Haven't visit her new love home since she got married also.

But anyway, the last stop for the eastern place was at Kembangan. Finally saw what Joe's house look like from outside, a big semi-detached.

But why only look from outside his house? Check out the next posted blog!

I Was There..



Guess where I was after work yesterday?

They all started with a "C".

And where will I be today? Most probably three places of eastern Singapore.

Mounting.

You know its absolutely sickening when you know you have earned a thousand plus but now you're going to be broke as well as your bills are mounting and you couldn't pay for it!

~~~~~

I guess the worse thing is when you realised you have to give gifts on their special occasions, you realised you have the minamal ability to do so..

And when I needed care and concern, no one seems to be there for me except my aunt agony..

So I am thinking, why give so much to the world when I see have no returns?

I wonder if everything I ever did in my life for who or what is ever worth giving my 100% anymore..

Viva VivoCity!

I do not know why I am at VivoCity again but finally for once, I really walked the whole mall, basically because Hong Yun (Thomas), Chee Wee, Junlong and I were lost looking for specific places in the big gigamall.

I was accompanying them to shop for their new year clothes. For me, I didn't have the money right now. Anyway, I still have new clothes at home bought by my mother from China's S&K and I haven't wear them yet. Ha. That'll help me save some money.

Manage to be an adviser for the rest of the guys' buys. Especially Junlong, who haven't bought any new clothes for a year. Upon hearing a 50% off buying through Chee Wee's friend working at Esprit, he bought 8 to 9 different clothings I think.

Wow. What a spree.

Chee Wee testing out a car at the Opel automobile roadshow at VivoCity.

During our walk around VivoCity, I manage to see Zane's Presidential Design Awards videos that she has been working so hard for and whining about.





When will I be in the video? Keke..

St. James

Went clubbing last night at St. James Power Station.

Hello, St. James. I love histroical sites : )

Its the first time I am there. Its really big (70k square feet!) and happening there. Providing for both mature and young crowds.

Towering chimney..

Tagging along with Hong Yun who was tagging along with Violet, Chee Wee, Junlong and I all went to join at the table of Violet's friend, another Claudia, who was celebrating her birthday there at The Boiler Room (Tiger Live).

Ordered a mug of beer for my first drink. Being called "depressing" as I was the only ordering it. I don't see why ordering a beer made me seem depressed. I just want to have more sips that's all.

Inside The Boiler Room.

The Boiler Room is a mix of occasional live band performances of rock and R&B (weird combo rocking R&B music), and the usual dance Hip Hop R&B music.

The dance music of HipHop R&B music is very nice, with all the latest and most popular music plays.

Apart from being in The Boiler Room, we went to look around at other places like Power House (like Zouk, Progressive Trance) and many others (but I don't know the names) with blues music, live rock etc. Pretty cool. Happening everywhere, especially DragonFly, in which the queue's so long, we didn't get in.

St. James is indeed a nice clubbing place, I did consider joining membership for St. James BUT in the end I didn't I don't cos' the DJ for HipHop R&B is just too damn kao peh.. I love the HipHop R&B music there, but the periodic breaks of bullshits from the DJ made me didn't maybe it not really worth the money. Haha.

But for now, I have no money to consider such membership also. Having too much of a dire financial situation. Imagine I had to borrow money to enter. Fuck.. My stupid salary still unpaid to me.. Don't know when I'll get my money.

Anwyay enjoy the clubbing experience at St. James totally on my own. Entertaining myself. Not really having much external entertainment from friends. Not interested in any girls there either. No wonder I'm called gay by Violet. Oh what the hell, I don't give a damn anyway.

Still I feel something is missing in my clubbing life..

It's Beginning To Get To Me
By Snow Patrol

I want something
That's purer than the water
Like we were

It's not there now
Ineloquence and anger
Are all we have

Like Saturn's rings
An icy loop around me
Too hard to hold

Lash out first
At all the things we don't like
Or understand

And it's beginning to get to me
That I know more of the stars and sea
Than I do of what's in your head
Barely touching in our cold bed

Are you beginning to get get my point
They're always fighting with aching joints
It's doing nothing but tire us out
No one knows what this fight's about

The answer phone
The lonely sound of your voice
Frozen in time

I only need
The compass that you gave me
To guide me on

And it's beginning to get to me
That I know more of the stars and sea
Than I do of what's in your head
Barely touching in our cold bed

Are you beginning to get get my point
They're always fighting with aching joints
It's doing nothing but tire us out
No one knows what this fight's about

It's so thrilling but also wrong
Don't have to prove that you are so strong
Cos I can carry you on my back
After our enemies attack

I tried to tell you before I left
But I was screaming under my breath
You are the only thing that makes sense
Just ignore all this present tense

We need to feel breathless with love
And not collapse under its weight
I'm gasping for the air to fill
My lungs with everything I've lost

We need to feel breathless with love
And not collapse under its weight
I'm gasping for the air to fill
My lungs with everything I've lost

When Life is Complicated...

Some things for your thoughts...

When its raining, it doesn't mean the rain wouldn't stop.
But when the sun is out, do you really appreciate its glow?

When someone has stopped showing his or her love,
Does it mean his or her love doesn't exist anymore?

When someone says he will stop crying,
Does it mean he wouldn't be crying still out of your sight?

When one live his or her live to the fullest,
Does it mean he is totally happy?

When someone says he knows where he is going,
Does he know what shit is he stepping right now?

Some thoughts.

I was conversing with FRIEND over the phone last night. She was telling me how badly treated verbally by a guy that she liked. Yet sometimes the guy's actions is nice to her also.

But seriously, from what I heard, when the guy got verbally bad, he really sounded that women owe him or something. It was really words that are insulting to a woman. Even "slut" word was used before. Even the statement he said that were not insulting also sounded threatening as in the sense that "Oh, you better stay away from me. I don't need you.", that kind of thing.

And so I told my FRIEND, no matter how much nice things he did to you. What he did to her was totally wrong. Moreover, I always felt that he was taking her for granted as a friend. Only calling her out when he needed her company, or when he know she could make things fun for his other friends.

If I were her, I'll feel that I'm expendable or something.

But the worse thing is, when the fun's over, he got to pass judgement when she's not fun.

I don't think that very nice, mister.

But well, when you love somebody, you wanted him or her to be better person.

Although for me, I can be very stupid saying wrong things in regards of a woman's taboo. I'm not the person who would like to say out or attack people's known weaknesses, because obviously I know that would hurt them.

I don't like to hurt people because I don't want to make enemies!

I only say things when I think or know that that person would have the utmost confidence in my trust. But if perhaps I don't really understand that person, or the person is over-sensitive, then whatever I said would be wrong in another person's eyes becos' most probably he or she would see me as a threat, an attacker to his or her confidence.

But frankly speaking, if a person's reaction is negative to a topic proposed was just a casual conversation, it might also show how confident or sensitive the person actually is. It might also show how the party who propose the topic, whether is he or she a stupid person or just downright insensitive.

Sometimes I really hope this world is much more simpler place.

I used to think very simple, but not any more.

Well, so much for years of "To Love & To Forgive" idealistic motto in secondary school. I might even have to re-think about the words "Forbearance" and "Cherish Relationships" that have been hanging in my room in sight for a decade.

Well, at least I don't hate things that I once truly loved I guess.

Hanging Out + Free Stuff

Hello people! Things have been recently very quiet on my blog. And I really wonder if anybody read some times. But anyway, I'll still blog or write on.

I've been recently hanging out after work thse past two days, so I didn't really have the energy to devote into my blog.

Anyway, I didn't really wanted to go home the past two days as I know I'm going to be in a jobless mode again.

Subconciously, I know my life now isn't that great. But somehow conciously, I didn't really show it or express it in any feelings, expressions or actions. Guess, I'm pretty numbed to my lousy life troubled with career, personal finance, and lack of social entertainment woes.

Maybe I did show signs that I'm bored with my life in actions. By going out on my own, or just go out with my friends even though I actually didn't wanted to.

~~~~~

Wednesday. I went out on my own. I don't know why I like to walk in the City Hall vicinity recently, maybe becos' its nearest to my work place. I was planning to head for the Library @ Esplanades.

Before I went, I met up with Zane for a short while to pass her a book. The poor overworked girl have lots of bullshit at her work place and every night I got to listen to her complains. She don't look like a zombie too much though. Wahahaha.

Got to scare her a bit with her Adidas guy being a melayu named Mahathir. Wahahaha!

Anyway after, after the short meeting, I went to the library. I had wanted to borrow some DVDs but got to realised I need to register to become a special member to do that. Sadly, I wasn't intrested to pay either cos' I know I don't always go and borrow also. So in the end I end up reading some film-related and script books there.

Before I left, I went up to the roof terrace at the Esplanades for a breather cos' I suddenly had this headache.

Moonlight @ Esplanades

It did help a little after some fresh air, but after I went home the headache worsen.

Doesn't make it better when I still have to listen to good FRIEND's ee ee oh oh in the night, which I actually love to listen cos' her voice very nice to listen. LOL.

~~~~~

Thursday. I have plenty of free gifts from work today.

First, I got a very nice free cup cake from my colleague Justine from The Finder.



Then another calendar, a very nice Corbis Photography Calendar which I really liked, from Jasmine, also my colleague from The Finder.



This calendar is very good, I even have spaces to write notes on it. And there are also a lot of nice, cool and cute photos with some interesting captions in it.

But since I already have a self re-made calendar, guess I'll use this calendar for its photography display.

~~~~~

After work, I went to meet up with Elvin and friends, Changxin and Peng You.

I know this meet I would have some female company. But since it is my best friend Elvin, who asked me out. And so I just went.

Because I was late, I had to rush there. I even went to the wrong meeting place of food court. Initially, I went to Food Junction at Harbour Front Centre instead of Food Republic at VivoCity.





When I did arrive at the food court, I saw a row of guys sitting opposite a row of girls. Then I was thinking, "What the...? Don't tell me its some sort of matchmaking or group date session...?"

But luckily, its not. Its a small commercial shoot to be used in the United States for introduction of local food and drinks from Singapore. And those nice looking ladies were from Yeo's Drinks company's marketing department. I didn't know Changxin was working in the Yeo's Drinks company either.



I said I felt a bit cheated. But actually I didn't feel that way. Cos' when my best friend ask me out, I know anything can happen. Ha.

We waited for a very long time for the American cameraman to start his work. The worst thing is actually looking at all those scrumptious meals of local delicacies, having to look at them and not able to eat them. Even when we really started eating, the food had already gone cold and we had to eat bit by bit.

But for me, I wasn't hungry as I really had a heavy lunch. Didn't really had the appetite to eat after laughing so much during our chatting session among ourselves. Anyway, Peng You was the hungry person.

The commercial was no hard work. The real hard work was getting free 24 packets of Yeo's drinks home, which was really heavy for my shoulders when I got them into my sling photo bag.

Normally I wasn't a kiasu person like Elvin. But I don't know why I took the drinks anyway.

最重要的小事
By MayDay 五月天
作詞：阿信　作曲：瑪莎

我　走過動盪日子　追過夢的放肆　穿過多少生死
卻　假裝若無其事　穿過半個城市　只想看你樣子

這一刻　最重要的事　是屬於你　最小的事

世界紛紛擾擾喧喧鬧鬧　什麼是真實
為你跌跌撞撞傻傻笑笑　買一杯果汁
就算庸庸碌碌匆匆忙忙　活過一輩子
也要分分秒秒年年日日　全心守護你　最小的事

我　就算壯烈前世　征服滾滾亂世　萬人為我寫詩
而　幸福卻是此時　靜靜幫你提著　哈囉凱蒂袋子

這一刻　最重要的事　是屬於你　最小的事

世界紛紛擾擾喧喧鬧鬧　什麼是真實
為你跌跌撞撞傻傻笑笑　買一杯果汁
就算庸庸碌碌匆匆忙忙　活過一輩子
也要分分秒秒年年日日　全心守護你　最小的事

你　笑得像個孩子　每個平凡小事　變成永恆故事

世界紛紛擾擾喧喧鬧鬧　什麼是真實
為你跌跌撞撞傻傻笑笑　買一杯果汁
就算庸庸碌碌匆匆忙忙　活過一輩子
也要分分秒秒年年日日　全心守護你　最小的事

世界紛紛擾擾喧喧鬧鬧　什麼是真實
為你跌跌撞撞傻傻笑笑　買一杯果汁
就算庸庸碌碌匆匆忙忙　活過一輩子
也要分分秒秒年年日日　全心守護你　最小的事
最重要的事

~~~~~

Nice song. That's all I can say.

"Wah Piang! What's Wrong With My Life?!"

I was suppose to head for the interview this morning, but I caught a serious flu this morning. Mucus flows out of my nose like some water tap while sneezing my ass off.

Really couldn't stop sneezing, so I had to postpone my interview tomorrow. Luckily, the interviewers accepted the postponing.

Life certainly felt unlucky this morning.

~~~~~

I got a call from the ACP Asia (yes, I was still their temporary employee yesterday but not today), The Finder magazine department's graphic designer, Sabrina.

I am hired back to ACP Asia as a temporary again, but this time I'm working for The Finder mag. Most probably working for them for only a couple of days.

Well, I work for money, so I don't really care how long the position lasts this time. Another couple of days meant I could earn just a bit more money.

Weird how my life is. Ups and downs. On and off. SUDDEN changes and changes.

God, what is going on arh?

Tough Luck: Dreams Stuck Again

I went to work as usual today, but by the end of the day I got a surprise.

My freelance service at the publisher has ended as in it was my last day, today. Pretty sudden, I am a bit surprised as there were no tell tale signs but I'm not exactly in shock.

Don't worry peeps, I did nothing wrong. Just that new interns are coming in. So I was replaced by "cheap labour" in a certain sense. Well, the interns are not even paid. So its a strategical move which I am able to understand by comparing human resource costs if I'm the boss.

Afterall, I've been advised by Linda-dear that I may encounter this kind of situation working for the publisher. But still it feels a wee-bit sucky having my income cut suddenly.

(I need $$$!!! $hit!)

Before I left, got some advises from mentor Christina that's very familiar. Funny, recently I've been advising people on the same things for their jobs, even for a friend yesterday. For that, it felt like, "What the hell? Is somebody playing a joke on my life again?"

Well, just have to move forward with life now anyway.

I have to re-plan, re-adjust and hope for the best for my life. I've fell so many times and I am still able to pick myself up.

What's a little misfortune now? Life is definitely full of shit.

I'll still fight on.

Tomorrow I still have a 2nd round interview for a 3D visualiser job, a mahjong sessions with my kakis (its been pretty long I had a game with them) and perhaps going to the beach on one of the free days since I'm free now.

Hurt
By Christina Aguilera

Seems like it was yesterday when I saw your face
You told me how proud you were but I walked away
If only I knew what I know today

I would hold you in my arms
I would take the pain away
Thank you for all you've done
Forgive all your mistakes
There's nothing I wouldn't do
To hear your voice again
Sometimes I want to call you but I know you won't be there

I'm sorry for blaming you for everything I just couldn't do
And I've hurt myself by hurting you
Some days I feel broke inside but I won't admit
Sometimes I just want to hide 'cause it's you I miss
You know it's so hard to say goodbye when it comes to this

Would you tell me I was wrong?
Would you help me understand?
Are you looking down upon me?
Are you proud of who I am?
There's nothing I wouldn't do
To have just one more chance
To look into your eyes and see you looking back

I'm sorry for blaming you for everything I just couldn't do
And I've hurt myself
If I had just one more day, I would tell you how much that
I've missed you since you've been away

Oh, it's dangerous
It's so out of line to try to turn back time

I'm sorry for blaming you for everything I just couldn't do
And I've hurt myself

By hurting you

C-Day

Today is C-Day. "C" meaning chores relating to clothes, cleaning, clearing and calendar (See? All Cs).

I spent almost the whole afternoon doing all these chores in my "cave" (my room).

First was to clear my wardrobe and clear those clothes I don't wear any more. The lack of space in my wardrobe and the messy looks of it convince me that its time for a big clear out.

I managed to filter half of my wardrobe. The rest of the clothes are too small or too old. Some might end up as rags, but most would probably they'll end up with the Salvation Army as I have no longer young male cousines which I can pass down to. Ha.

Manage to sort out my better clothes and catergorised them, and packed them back into my wardrobe cardboard. Looking cool now.

The second thing I did was general cleaning of my room. Phase one was clearing some stuff and re-organising items. My computer study table was in a complete mess but now its clean and neat.

Phase two was clearing my other parts of my room. Finally got my fatigues retired into the plastic box and I hope I'll never be called up for war. Ha. My mirror table was also cleaned up and re-organised. So are some of the rest of my room.

Phase three was cleaning of dust and dirt. Got the vaccuum cleaner to do that. Now, everything is pretty much dust free. Some general items I also managed to wash them up.

For the third agenda of the C-Day, it is to remake my calendar. As I got new calendar cards from the MayDay album I bought, I realised I needed a stand for them. With some simple idea, I reused a cool poster ad I got to wrap up the old calendar stand. I used a clear transparency as the cards holding function. Now, my new self-remake calendar is in position for my new year. It also temporary act up as my namecard holder since I haven't got a place for them yet.



; )

BLiSS

This Saturday is not really that boring, cos' I seem to be busy on things I never expected.

Last night while chatting with FRIEND, my internet died. I went to troubleshoot and even tried on system recover my compy. Next morning, I continued to troubleshoot for the whole morning.

Anyway, I wasn't suppose to be awake so early this morning. I was awaken by Valerie who asked me to go for the interview today.

Although slightly caught by suprise for this appointment set, I went in the afternoon. The interview was okay but the position's job scope wasn't what I wanted. From the job posting I got from the job recruiting post on the internet, which was Assistant DESIGNER, it became a Pre-Press Assistant on the interview.

What a switch if I ever take this job that is.

The pay is great and I could learn how to lias with people and have more challenges in terms of responsibilities. But I was looking for a more design-oriented job rather than a pre-press layout job like this.

It was nothing but cigarettes packaging pre-pressing no wonder they pay so well. But the printing pre-press job is really of a great responsibility. One mistake from me might cost the company a few thousands US dollars.

Anyway, the thought of working for tobacco companies made me feel a bit "evil".

Its not that I'm afraid to do mistakes. But thinking of the way the job's schedule is as told by the interviewers, which is 5 days per week but still have to come back on weekends at a moment's notice, I just didn't wanted to have such that too much time devotion into work because I rather have a life.

I know I enjoy life more than just work itself. Well-paid it may be, but it just doesn't match my character of being free person.

~~~~~

After the interview, I went to Elvin's house which is nearby my interviewing place. I went to check him out because I didn't see him for quite some time too. Heard he got flu but at least he is all right and crapping a lot now.

After that I went home, and continued to troubleshoot the internet and then update my system and its programmes. Now everything is fine with my beloved compy. My only entertainment source other than the telly.

Just now, I had a chat with a bunch of girls on the messenger. They were my old secondary school classmates, Vannessa, Agnes and Amy. Along with Elvin, it was fun chatting in one conversation box together. And knowing we're all well after all this time, I feel good for them too.

Hope to meet up some time, perhaps this next coming Friday at St. James Power Station.

Funny, recently I kept on having to link up with my BLSS (Boon Lay Secondary School) mates on very sudden occasions.

Another weird thing, I never seem to take a break in communicating with women for at least one night since don't know when..

(Where's my FRIEND?! LOL. She's working like a buffalo dragging to plow the farm these days..)

Weird fate..

Lost~

I went for my interview which was at Macpherson today. Damn far from my house but I dind't really want to hiam about it. Moreover, the job is working of 3D stuff, something that I would like to do.

The interview went pretty well. My interviewer is Paul, and Paul is definitely a friendly and open-minded guy. After the usuals of the interviewing, I got a "surprise test".

Paul asked me to do 3D modelling of some interior design settings of a gym. I made them, though not with exactly flying colours. But he said I did impressed him doing better than other interviewees, with my ways of unorthodoxy when I forgot on the more simpler methods to do things even though I was slightly rusty with my 3D Max skills.

At least I get things done by asking when it is the right thing to ask, or when to be creative with my ways.

~~~~~

After the interview, I went to Orchard for a walk again. I didn't had the mood to go home after travelling a long way from the west.

I wandered from Orchard, to Dhouby Ghaut, then to City Hall. Although it was a long way, I did feel at peace and at pace while listening to the beat of my new rock music. It was kinda great.

After that, I went through City Link shopping mall, then headed for the Pacific Coffee Company cafe at Raffles Link One.

I went there to drink Rocky Mocha, it was really sweet and nice. Relaxing down there while reading my "Marley & Me".



~~~~~

After chilling, I went to meet up with Eddie, whom I haven't met for quite some time.

So from my chill place, I walked through Suntec all the way to Bugis, where I had dinner with him at the coffeeshop at Sim Lim Square (yes, walk there) then we went to Bugis Junction to blow air-con while taking a look around. Our final stop was to chill at the C.A.N. cafe at Liang Seah Street where we had even a longer chat there on our going-ons.

He said he turned "good", as he partied less nowadays.

But I told him I'll party with him next tme on my birthday celebration when I most probably open a bottle or two for my firends to enjoy in return of their company with me all these while.

Tired after being out for the whole day, we decided to go home. On MRT train, we chatted more till he alighted for his home.

Hope to meet my buddy up another time again.

I Got A Surprise.

Was sleeping like a pig just now. I guessed I was really, really tired from work yestedray.

My chat with Zane last night also didn't go through very late into the very late night also. She was obviously tired, and I kept hurrying her to sleep. That crazy zombie.. had so little sleep and still say she wasn't tired. Siao.

Anyway, I slept tight last night. Did wanted to wake up early to jog this morning but I just felt like sleeping cos' the last week I either had sleep with bad quantity sleep or quality sleep.

So yesterday's was a rare chance. But still I was disturbed.

I got a "morning call" from a career consultant of a job that I applied last night at around 9am. Not complaining too much, I went to pick it up. The calls were persistant.

And I got to know why. I talked to the consultant on the usual "get-to-know-you" conversation and suddenly, she told me I was her ex-secondary school classmate, Valerie.

Indeed, when I emailed her, her name was Valerie, but still I was surprised by the coincidence. She said she'll be putting me for the job interview ASAP because she know me.

I am very grateful and I feel so blessed : )

Seriously..

..I don't know how she expect me to go clubbing with her buddy, especially when she's around, after all the things that happened, when she declared we're hi-bye friends and I accepted the situation.

.. It's not the matter whether I have the courage to face her or whether I'm guilty to face her. Anyway, that's all the past..

But still I just don't know how to face her.

Yes, we move on. But this kind of situation? How? I don't even know what to do..

Especially after the incident, I didn't really got to call those friends to join in that fun, when I know I'm not going to have the fun anyway. I'm going to be "alone" even if I go.

But seriously, I'm sorry to her buddy who went through maybe a lot of trouble just to get me all the tickets I needed for my friends in the first place. He wasn't suppose to be affected by all this.

I really appreciated his generousity. But I'm truly sorry I couldn't go, could have introduced some of my friends, especially the girls to him but..

I supposed things still haven't totally settle down yet..

I still need my own time.

A Peaceful Day

I had a peaceful day today. Not too much mundane job tasks and not overloaded with work also. I feel that's its pretty good.

Finally got to lunch with my bunch of colleagues from my Women's Weekly department today as we all didn't really have much to do as we're waiting for our resources to come so that we can complete our work.

Bumped into Simon, an interesting old acquaintant of mine whom I don't actually quite remember his name but I recognised him. He had the same understanding of me too.

We met went I was in the networking business.

What's so interesting about this guy is that, he changed his occupation frequent. He was once some secretive commercial-related manager, followed by something else. And now he's a photographer.

Got to exchange number with him. Might need his help some day.

Then after that, I got to lunch with my colleagues and followed by a short shopping walk-a-round at the Great World City's Cold Storage. I got myself a six-packet of Vitasoy drink which I bought for future breakfast drinks.

My mentor, Christina, excitedly show me a faster way to pay for my single item. A self-service scanning and paying machine like the way you borrow library books. She say only Great World City's Cold Storage has this self-service system. Interesting.

~~~~~

As I will be having an interview tomorrow instead working (I wanted to worked for the morning tomorrow then go for my interview, but my art director Ivy says no due to troublesome of counting my work hours she said).

I was tired. But I felt very bored and I don't feel like going home. So I went to Orchard to take a walk and look around, aka shopping.

I went to The Heeren's HMV, where I took some time to listen to some music and I decided to buy MayDay's "Born to Love" album and U2's "U218 Singles".



Hope these music can help me settle down my heart into no thinking so much else except my career.

Then, I went to The Garge at The Heeren's, followed by Left Foot at Orchard Cineleisure. Then it was all the way to The Pacific Plaza's The Gallery (but too bad it was closed). Spotted a cool striped, embossed textured coffee brown Nike 6.0 dunk, which I like but I couldn't get.

Then after I went to the Wheelock Place to check out more of Crumpler's stuff but nothing was pretty interesting to me. My last stop was at The Borders.

Spotted some great books.

Tireing for my eyes, which has serious eyebags and eye rings, I just went to the MRT station and took a train home.. That's how tired I am..

Going to sleep.. after chatting with Zane tonight : p

A Day of Sights.

A nice sight taken while on my bus trip to work.

Just finished talking with FRIEND clocking two hours on the phone.

Still not feeling tired, except for my eyes, because I see a lot of things today.

Work is pretty slack today, but I consider boring doing those mundane administrative work on old stock pictures.

But well.. someone has to do the "dirty" job. Better than nothing to do : )

I treat it as a rest for the bigger workload in the near future.

At least I got that "xian kong" (slack time) to read up on my "Marley & Me" story book again or read up on articles on wikipedia, while doing my slow automated processing work of those stock pictures.

I don't really like to "eat snake". So I am willing to do work one, especially now.

And I got free stuffs again.

It is very nice of Angie, the food editor to share half of a very nice English sandwich to munch on when I was bored alone in my working cubicle, I thank her for it though I gave a pretty weak smile cos' I was a bit tired with my mundane and boring work then.

Designer Karen also gave me a very cool calendar for my workplace. I wonder if I can bring it home and use it instead :P

Life should be like that.

Just enjoy the process and don't think so much on the negativities

Let care, concern and love come naturally to you.

No need to reject anything that God gave it to you : )

A New Day.

I'm going to have a brand new start in my heart.

How about you? : )

~~~~~

My buddy FRIEND is back from Bintan! Yeah~!

~~~~~

第六感
By 孫燕姿

感情的事沒有絕對　後來該由自己體會
哦　浪費眼淚　不如乾脆早點 作好心理準備

我想跟隨自己的第六感　說不定下次運氣會好轉
我相信簡單　我相信偶然　相信直覺會有答案

我想真愛應該不會太難　否則世界就不會有圓滿
幸福的指環　在誰的手上　等他給我預感 等他給我預感

管他受傷是為了誰　過去丟了也無所謂
哦　忙著後悔　不如乾脆早點　作好心理準備

我想跟隨自己的第六感　說不定下次運氣會好轉
我相信簡單　也相信偶然　相信直覺會有答案

我想真愛應該不會太難　否則世界就不會有圓滿
幸福的指環　在誰的手上　跟隨著第六感 ya

我想真愛應該不會太難　否則世界就不會有圓滿
幸福的指環　在誰的手上　跟隨著第六感　跟隨著第六感　ya

I Can Only Say One Thing..

We're like 火星撞地球.. Forget it and move on..

永遠
By 孫燕姿

穿過人群　擁擠的夜　熟悉的地方　陌生的眼光
音樂繼續　瀰漫想像　你就在前方　站在夢想的路上

永遠　曾經在哪裡實現　永遠　卻在那一天走遠
匆匆的　那一眼　交會的　畫面
消失在　你身邊　靜止的光線
所有你渴望的劇情　已經握在你的手心　

永遠　不是我就能實現　永遠　就算還記得那天
深深的　那一頁　交換的　誓言
埋藏在　我心中　以為不會變
曾經堅持過的故事　不必再提　沒有人在意

和平
By 孫燕姿

這一天正開始 昨天生過壞事
太陽還是同個姿勢 小鳥還是那個拍子
沒什麼停止 別人繼續過日子站在地球小小位置
誰在意我們的爭執
突然間 有一點情緒 也有一些道理
說給陌生人聽 那聲音
消失空氣裡 也就沒有留下任何壞的訊息
愛是固執的
我只要在兵慌馬亂中找到和平
和平對待你不掉淚是因為好多事還要努力
我是固執的
我微笑就代表我正在要求和平
和平對待你 這一天
就這麼開始
我會相信你 我會相信你
真的相信你 我會相信你

Snaily Monday

Not exactly having a Monday blues today, but I have other blues.

I'm not sad over things I can't control anymore. I did what I can do. If given another chance to explain, I'll still explain. But whether the other party is willing to accept is another issue, I'll have to respect and accept it somehow.

At least I know I tried.

I finally went out with lunch with someone from my office today. But I am pretty broke now that I have to eat sandwich I got from home instead of buying food outside.

Jessie is one of the few people I could really chat with in my office now as she's really a sociable person (well, she was a public relations officer). And our age isn't really that far.

I interacted with her more than other colleagues because we need each others' workstations for some work task in which our own compies cannot deal with. So we always have to switch workstations pretty often.

(Work doesn't seem to progress a lot today. Mostly the adminstrative stuff to be done today. Computers, computer programmes and printers just seem to defy a lot of people today.)

Like me, she's also working for a temporary period for the publisher. The only difference is that she's hired by contract and I'm hired as a freelancer attached for an unknown period which could be ask to leave anytime.

She's a sub-editor, while I'm designer.

During lunch, I told her I am still bothered that I just lost a friendship. So I got to share with her on that a bit. She said that relationships do changed at times and maybe we're just too tough and tiring being with each other.

I know all that. Just that I need time to adapt with her in my life now.

Then we came to share how broke we both are. But I told her, obviously, I am more broke than her becos' I had to eat sandwich now. She still can at least buy a bowl of mee for herself. Then we share ideas on how to save on meals.

It feels better and less lonelier than having a meal on my own, especially during times like this.

And I thank Him for that.

~~~~~

I really miss my talking cock with my FRIEND.. Only she knows how I feel because she went through something like this before.

Hope she's having enough rest for her working trip in Bintan though. She must be looking like a zombie now.

Practice What You Preach

It was just a few lines some personal literature I blurted out when I got emotional. I may have expressed incorrectly by expression not by my heart.

Readers and friends, if I ever wrote something that wasn't right I wrote in my blog, message you on MSN messenger or email about you, please tell me.

Don't let a small problem snowball into a big problem then you tell me there is a problem.

Though blogging is a way of expressing oneself, some times the way things I expressed terms could be wrong. Personally the author might not see it but you readers do.

If you felt something that was wrong, you should have tell me early before people misunderstood the whole situation and in turn judge another individual.

When there's issues left unsolved we should just bring it up instead of leaving unresolved.

How many times have I've asked if there's any unresolved issues but all I got was quietness, or a "no" for an answer and say there's no anger (no anger but there are greviances, its just as bad) and I have to keep having to explain previous and multiple issues again and again in circles, especially they are all interlinked somehow.

Yes, I can show words to a friend that does not sound right to me to demand justice in a sense. But I always let them see every single word and lines (instead of a couples of lines which is focused too much) and explain everything on how both sides of the party feel? I did. I always let them see both sides of things.

I even admit mistakes that are on my side. And they also do see the other party's mistakes too on the basis of neutrality.

And everyone make mistakes when they get emotional, because we all know we had no motives or real intentions to hurt each other.. I'm no superhero either, I'm just human.. No individual is perfect.

The other party did did mistakes and I could just forgive and forget.

But if we are too focused on the mistakes of a friend did because of his character, then we'll never accept him or her as a person.

So the best thing is normally to forgive and forget..

But I wasn't forgived, and the other party couldn't forget.

*Sigh* I don't always expect the same things to be treated to me when I treated to people.. But.. its a pity that's all. I'm too naive..

Friendship turned to dust..

A regret that we both be dragging all our lives..

Stronger.

Its funny how I manage to overcome this week of dramatic events.

I experienced, I realised, I reflected and I change, NOW.

And I'll become stronger.

I came into a lot of conclusions after this week also.

I try to keep some words in my heart and mind. Becos' I know words are harder than fists.

But if this is the case that she thinks of me that I don't know about myself, then I doubt it'll be difficult for us to become lovers anyway.

Yes, I liked her very much before. I know that. And I didn't regret it.

But that's all the past now. I just want to move on now.

For now, I just want to be friends with her, forever.

I rather have a friend than an enemy.

~~~~~

I was being Uncle Agony for Joe just now.

A girl had an infatuation with him for five years, but he never really contacted her all this while. She wrote an email to him confessing her love and is coming back to Singapore.

But as Joe didn't know what words to use to reject her, he has asked for my help instead.

Funny.. I kept typing wrong words in the past and now he asked me to write one such a letter of reply to that friend of his.

What a joke life is, isn't it?

*Shakes Head..*

I just don't know why some things have to go so awry. Whatever I said seem to be perceived as a threat or something negative.

If its an opinion or a comment, good or bad, all you need to do is to say yes or no to it. Just a yes or no, an answer, will simply make me shut and respect the answer.

I don't think there's a need to question motive or finding fault.

Still I have manage to remain calm and sincere.

Zane told me to "f**k care" her a long time ago like the way she treated her "counterpart". But I didn't listen.

Because I think "f**k care" is too attitudely, damaging wrong for any relationship.

I still really care because I really cherish, but maybe I should have chosen a better timing. I seem to always choose a wrong timing.

But I think whatever that goes between me and her is always a matter of bad timing, miscommunication and lack of open-heartedness due to anger and resentment.

A New Zealander online friend who was aware of my situation remained objective, rather than some of my close friends who are more of being protective of me (anyway, I appreciate all of their advices), said,

"Its not your fault alone now, regarding this friendship. Don't let all the fault be on you, Jeff. Afterall, it takes two hands to clap. You have admitted all you mistakes, explained and apologised. If the other party is forgiving, he or she wouldn't continue to feel negative and find fault with your words.

Humans are all like that, they rather do the blame game than to admit their own mistakes. Sadly, when the first party admits their own mistakes first, sometimes, the second party thought they were 'right' afterall. But in fact, both were in wrong in the escalation of any bad situation.

Its not a matter of who started this bullshit in the first place, or who continued to do wrong trying to save this relationship now, or who actually might have ended it.

If that is the case, there will never be an end to it. Its like revenge, it'll never end.

If you're a sweet loving couple for 30 years, and suddenly you encounter this kind of bullshit. Is it worth just ending the relationship like that? No right?

And when I am using this comparison, Jeff, I'm talking about the quality time having this relationship together, not to that on the quantity of time.

Remembering the good moments is something that made any relationship last forever. Rather than carrying any resentment throughout which just makes you want to end the relationship.

So the best thing for everyone is to forgive and forget."

Yes, forgive and forget.

Let time do its healing.

Taking Charge of My Life.

Work was usual today, except I did faster and faster every single day now.

I guess it only seems so because I could only complete half of each job task today. So now I have 8 job tasks still half-done. But no worries, I'll be able to handle it tomorrow.

I got something free from my company again.

I spotted this book when I went to MPH at CityLink with Andrew Shen last weekend, and browsed it through before. I would have got it if I have had the money to. It seems like a really good motivational + entrepreneurship book for Singaporeans who want to live their dreams.

I saw this book again yesterday. It was left near my working place where it was also near the workstation where all of us would scan our images.

In the book, it was written that the book was given to Angie, the food editor for Women's Weekly mag, by the author Merry Riana herself!

I thought Angie would have got it back on her own, so I didn't bother to return to her.

But after a day, it was still there. Then, another sub-editor came in, and said, "Hmm.. Think I better throw this away. We got four copies of this already."

I was like, "What?! Throwing such a good book?! This book cost at least $20+ in bookstore!", in my mind.

I immediately retrieve the book back from the trash bin, and I told her, I will like to read it, its good.



I wonder what's wrong with people these days. Just don't treasure the good stuff.

What a waste it would be if it ended in some incinerator plant.

Even if they don't need this book, they can either donate to the library, give it to someone who might like it and even sell it on eBay for cash.

If Horoscopes Are So Accurate..

Just seen my horoscope advice for the day:

"One of your most cherished relationships is shifting into a lower gear, but that should not cause you any concern whatsoever. This is just a phase that the two of you are going through -- that you have to go through before you can get closer. Maybe you both need to explore life apart, or maybe you both need to learn how to cherish something you were starting to take for granted. Whatever the reason, go off on your own for a while and enjoy the perspective that solitude offers."

Well, this is what I'll be doing anyway. Not so sure about the concern part also, though I know I'm still concerned (if I do not concern at all, it most probably means I don't cherish). But for getting "closer" part, I doubt I will want to get too close ever again. I'm already totally turned off.

A Long Day..

Damn. I thought I managed to finish all my assigned job tasks today. But actually I didn't. I realised that I missed out two job tasks left in my inbox tray at the end of the day.

Work is all on my mind now. This feeling of wanting to achieve more really feels good though.

But I am tired physically. Had a long day.

I met up with my replacement insurance agent, Sheryl, after work. The meet up with her was to upgrade my savings plans with more protection and my future financial needs.

Had a nice chit-chat with her before business at Bugi's McDonald's. Told her I was very sad a day before yesterday. Told her roughly what happened. And as a new friend, she gave me some advices and consolation.

I told her I wasn't as sad I was in the past today, but I appreciate her advices and listening anyway.

She said I am open-minded and a forward-looking person. It doesn't seem like I went hrough a turmoil of agony and wonders why I can still smile. And I told her there's nothing I can do now but let time do its healing. I can't dwell on the bad things and things I cannot control forever, and I did my best to save whatever I can.

I don't know what to do already anyway, although I just kept hoping there's still friendship.

Sheryl said I really understand a Piscean very well (Sheryl's a Piscean), but I said I don't think I really know and I don't really wanted to know.

I think knowing too much of a person sometimes reveals the person's secrets he or she is trying so hard to hide. And its hard becos' no person ever wanted anyone else to know their secret. No one ever wanted to be seen thoroughly through.

Anyway, sometimes I don't understand myself, and sometimes people also don't understand me as well.

So now, I choose to understand myself first. Maybe learn to express myself better and vocabulary correct. Don't want to be misunderstood again just becos' I use a wrong word for my own thesaurus in my brain. It sucks.

Then came chirpy Zane in pink, who came to find me so she could get a software programme installer CD from me. She joined us in the meet for a while, while having her dinner, her only meal of the day.

Like a kid, the moment she arrived, all she kept saying was, "I am hungry.. and blah, blah, blah, blah.." again and again. Then she went to buy a happy meal with a nice little toy. Sheryl and I both think she was very cute. Waha..

She cheered everyone up as all of us had a long day at work : )

This made all of us had a better business talk + chit-chat in between, with Zane joining like a curious child asking questions. Eventually, even Sheryl made friends with Zane.

Feel so happy and funny, seeing how friends can be easily made. But I know I need to treasure them cos' friendships are even harder to keep.

After her meal, Zane went home on her own. I continued with my personal financial analysis by Sheryl before we went home westwards by MRT train together. In which we continued to chat till her boyfriend came to pick her up.

After that I just went home to rest and relax.

Thank You All.

I wish to thank all of you dear friends and buddies who been by my side accompanying me these days..

I thank you Joe for trying to teach me how to be a man. I'm not a softie bro.

Just that recently, two weeks ago, I am trying to deal with my own emotions to bring down my hopes on my relationship with that someone from one level down, to give it up to another level on my own. But then suddenly that relationship was going down to another, something I didn't expect.. Too much to handle.

I thank you my dear cousin Vel, always by my side when you hear I'm in trouble, again.

I thank you my army buddy, Alex, whom accompanied me playing games during the late night to forget time.. Had fun. We all had fun next time. I'll buck up on my reversi to defeat you next time : )

I thank you my "attitude" army buddy, Chee Keong, who is always concerned about me. Not say I wasn't concern about you. Just that I think you have a lot of pride. But I know you can handle your life's bullshits on you own, you're more stronger than me I think.

I thank you my best friend Elvin, who always tried to give me advices but I don't listen. Its not that I'm not listening bro. But its just that I chose that way.. follow my heart. Anyway, you're my very good friend indeed. By the way, you can tag on my blog again, but please be tactful : )

And last but not least and my most precious good friend and talk cock buddy, my Auntie Agony, Zane. We're always switching "agony" roles. Haha. I'm so glad I found such a crazy old friend back into my life.

Now I learn to remember those better memories of you guys instead of all those grieviences and bad things I had with you guys and everyone else.

I guess forgive and forget is the best solution to our problematic human relationships. We stay happier that way.

Mixed Feelings.

I thought explaining might solve misunderstandings, but I seriously do not know whether it got worse or better..

Guess everyone needs time. When one is just too angry, no point rebuking issues anymore because anger doesn't make one listen.

I am trying to remain calm for now.

Still I went to work for the first day this week with a very heavy heart. I can only hope that she understands, no one is winning, everyone is losing something called friendship now. From my point of view, every friendship is a treasure to me. Even those I have conflicts with, eventually, I manage to learn how to treasure them even more.

Anway, like I said, I went to work with a heavy heart and mixed feelings.

At moments I hear some songs in the office from a nearby radio, I almost cried, but I held my tears. I didn't reveal my emotions.

I am also confused, because I felt that I did nothing wrong except saying some wrong words which the other party felt offended.

And when we're trying to protect someone's feelings, maybe we still felt too hurt to react positively for their protection. Its like skin drafting on your skin burns. Normally when we feel that its still too painful, we might just reject treatment.

Perhaps like she said, we all trying to make our point of view, not actually on purpose to harm anyone. Whether either of us is wrong or right doesn't seem to matter to me. All I know is losing a friend I know isn't right..

When we fight for who's wrong and who's right, we sacrificed a lot of intangible things.

When something important to me is on the verge of death, I am willing to put down all I got to save it, that included my own pride and reputation.

Some friends thought I was stupid and too gentle. Maybe I am. Someone got to start first..

I am definitely sure that its not about whether I like her or not. Its about losing someone as a friend.

I also felt very lost. I went to lunch alone. With some sadness. It was raining, but I didn't bother and just walked my way through.

Surprisingly, my mentor Christina praised that I was working fast today. But I felt I was working as slowly normally, because I felt time runs so slow.

After work, I went to return some library books at the Central Library in Bugis, then I walked aimlessly for a while till I reached the Esplanades Theatres. I sat there for a while. Took some pictures of the city skyline and myself to say, "I was here.. as a sad person."





After that, I just went home..

What Happened?

All I wrote was just, "Hiya.. Watever.. Don't want to argue"

All because of that "Watever"?

Is it going to cost the friendship between us? I don't think its worth it at all.

I didn't know even realised you're "pissed" only after go read your blog again. Its very hard for me to judge what exactly going on with your mood on MSN everytime do you know that?

If I ever did something wrong, you need to be more straightforward. I cannot always guess what exactly you're thinking, right?

I didn't know your personal message of "Just pissed", was meant for me? How do I know? I didn't want to think so much you know. I just want to move on.

Especially after I had been thinking through a whole night last night and a whole day today. Yes, I was a bit agitated because they was still abit of anger in me because I've been hurt.. You apologised, I forgived you but I was still agitated, of course.

I'm human.

After going through the argument with you yesterday, crying through the night, thinking it through what I want between you the whole day today, I was just tired..

I am really tired, that's why I just do not wish to argue with you anymore. So when the superwoman issue comes up, I knew I was going argue with you on it.

But I didn't. That's why I typed, "Hiya.. Watever.. Don't want to argue".

I wasn't playing attitude with you or anything. It only meant that I DON'T WANT TO ARGUE with you anymore which will worsen our friendship. I'm sorry if I made you pissed, but this time, I didn't even know what I did wrong to you.

Please don't do this. This is just a misunderstanding, and I seriously do not wish to lose you as a friend like this.

Its totally not worth it.

I hope you read this. Cos' I cannot do anything now. The decision is really yours to make. I really still want to be you drinking kaki and friend.

We all need time to cool down and think about better things we can do as friends.

Hope you reply something to me.

星期一天氣晴我離開你
By 孫燕姿

離開愛情　我沒有行李
找不到表情　可是不恨你
離去
因為我不愛推理的遊戲　不想繞路只為了避開你
我有一點傷心

傷心讓人　不想愛自己
那麼也只好　暫時不愛你
拉開距離　等著有一天忽然想起你
離開的原因再也想不起
再翻出舊的日記從新寫起

星期一　天氣晴　我離開(了)你
突然就下了決心　我在日曆上面畫下星星
星期一　天氣晴　我離開你
不帶任何行李　除了一本陪我放逐的日記

今天天晴　心情很低　突然決定離開你　oh~

Sometimes Love Just Ain’t Enough

I don’t wanna lose you,
I don’t wanna use you
Just to have somebody by my side
And I don’t wanna hate you
I don’t wanna take you
But I don’t wanna be the one to cry
That don’t really matter to anyone, anymore
But like a fool I keep losing my place
And I keep seeing you walk through that door

But there’s a danger in loving somebody too much
And it’s sad when you know it’s your heart you can’t trust
There’s a reason why people don’t stay where they are
Baby sometimes love just ain’t enough

Now I could never change you
I don’t wanna blame you
Baby you don’t have to take the fault
Yes I may have hurt you
But I did not desert you
Maybe I just wanna have it all
It makes a sound like thunder
It makes me feel like rain
And like a fool who will never see the truth
I keep thinking something’s gonna change

But there’s a danger in loving somebody too much
And it’s sad when you know it’s your heart you can’t trust
There’s a reason why people don’t stay where they are
Baby sometimes love just ain’t enough

And there’s no way home
When it’s late at night and you’re all alone
Are there things that you wanted to say
Do you feel me beside you in your bed
There beside you where I used to lay

And there’s a danger in loving somebody too much
And it’s sad when you know it’s your heart they can’t touch.
There’s a reason why people don’t stay who they are
Cause baby sometimes love just ain’t enough.
Baby sometimes love just ain’t enough.

I Cannot Deny..

"I cannot deny that I still like you. Its true.

Its easy for you to simply ask me to treat you as a friend. Yes, I wanted to. Cos' I treasure and respect your every decision. But its definitely not easy for me. I'm a bad liar I know.

But the problem is, I can't even lie to myself. Ever since I know you, I've always hoped that you'll always be my friend at start. I know people around are always charmed by you and start to fall in love with you.

For about half a year, I treated you as a friend. I was happy. For another next few months later, I started to seriously like you and.. fall in love with you. Something I couldn't control, and I did try to resist my feelings for you.

It didn't worked. My actions doesn't match what I ask myself to do, they just followed what my heart told me to.

Its not easy to say I like you then. Its a struggle. Its not easy for me to understand you. We live distances apart. Timing for me to at least see you is always wrong. You seem like a dream to me.

When incidents do happened, its not always because of me. Its for you sake that I behave that way. Yes, you can say this is my excuse. But have you ever thought why I behave these ways? Cos' I don't want to lose you even more, as a friend.

I am totally scared, scared of losing you as a friend.

The story I heard from my buddy Zane, who really had the similar situation with the guy she likes, but now they were less than friends.

And that really scares me.

I know you're scared of commitments now.

But if you were me, would you give up easily someone whom you treasure and love so much just like that? No.

I don't want to be Andy, whom you say he said he would wait for you, but in th end he.. I don't want to be like him, do you understand?

Its painful, I wanted to let go. To free myself. Every time I tried to, it hurts like hell. I didn't know how many times I cried for you in my bed. I didn't know how many times I laughed at myself..

If you didn't like what I did to you, please say it out next time. Cos' when I hug you, I couldn't see you expression.. When you're angry after we're chatted on MSN, I also can't see you angry face too..

I want to treat you as a friend.. in a different way, so forgive me if I ever offended you. It isn't on purpose.

I know I'm not the person who'll always make you happy.. So I chose to put down my feelings for you..

:.(

Chill for Tonight.

I went to chill with Andrew Shen the photographer. He's my army friend and he's one of my favourite photographer friend too. I always like to go and see his photography works.

He's the kind of person who work and live his own dreams. I admire him in that aspect, an aspect which I hope I learn to live by too.

I went to have a simple dinner with him at a coffeeshop at Bukit Batok. Chat on the past time we had during the training days.

After, we headed to Raffles City's Prints. He's getting a nice album for all the wonderful photographs for his mother, friend and mentor. He's leaving for New Zealand for his studies at the University of Auckland there.

He's up and down all over the place looking for that one nice album.

He sure took his own sweet time to choose a nice looking album. But that made him a sweet and sincere guy for his friends and family right?

: )

For me, I wasn't doing anything much. Although I did gave him some advices on the choice of colours on the album and some nice ribbons. But being at Prints gave me a burst of ideas in my brains of what gifts I can make using Prints' products for my love ones during around the month of February, when alot of their birthdays are.

Anyway, after finally getting what he wanted, Andrew and I went to Cafe Cartel to chill to have some drinks and finger food and continued our chat on the going ons with our lives.

We went home together taking the MRT transit.

~~~~~

I was having some clubbing withdrawal syndrome just now, luckily it die down.

I spotted a big bright moon tonight. Made my heart at peace.

擁抱
By 五月天



脫下長日的假面　奔向夢幻的彊界
南瓜馬車的午夜　換上童話的玻璃鞋
讓我享受這感覺　我是孤傲的薔薇
讓我品嚐這滋味　紛亂世界的不了解

昨天太近　明天太遠　默默聆聽那黑夜
晚風吻盡　荷花葉　任我醉倒在池邊
等你清楚看見我的美　月光曬乾眼淚　　　　
那一個人　愛我
將我的手　緊握
抱緊我　吻我　喔　愛　別走

隱藏自己的疲倦　表達自己的狼狽
放縱自己的狂野　找尋自己的明天
向你要求的誓言　就算是你的謊言
我需要愛的慰藉　就算那愛已如潮水

昨天太近　明天太遠　默默聆聽那黑夜
晚風吻盡　荷花葉　任我醉倒在池邊
等你清楚看見我的美　月光曬乾眼淚　　　　
那一個人　愛我
將我的手　緊握
抱緊我　吻我　喔　愛　別走

抱緊我　吻我　喔　愛　別走
抱緊我　吻我　喔　愛　別走

That Heavy Arrow in his Heart

"I am so tired..", says the Angel Teddy Bear with a broken wing. "..carrying this arrow which bears both her name and mine. But it is I who alone who carries this heavy arrow alone all the time.."

"I want to pull it out now, but after carrying for your sake for so long,
I have no strength to do it now."

"Yet, I am still trying to pull it. Again I pulled and stopped, pulled and stopped..
All I felt nothing but pain and pain..", says Angel Teddy Bear..

Angel Teddy Bear with a broken wing gave a very long sigh.. And tears fell from his eyes..

Angel Teddy Bear cried with tears in pain and sents a dove with a message scroll strapped to its leg, to his friend, Angel Black Cow with red dyed hair with golden streaks, with cast on one her previously broken wings.

He messages Angel Black Cow, "Friend, tears fell from my eyes again.."

She replies a message, "Cheer up my friend. Good angel don't cry.. I chat with you tonight."

Angel Teddy Bear walked back crying alone into his own cave..

我以為
By 品冠

妳曾說不想有天讓我知道 妳對他 有那麼好
妳說會懂 我的失落 不是靠寬容 就能夠解脫

我以為我出現的時候剛好 妳和他 正說要分開
我以為妳 己對他不再期待 不縱容他 再給妳傷害

我以為我的溫柔 能給妳整個宇宙
我以為我能全力 填滿妳感情的缺口
專心陪在妳左右 彌補他一切的錯
也許我太過天真 以為奇蹟會發生

。。。

我以為終究妳會慢慢明白 他的心 已不在妳身上
我的關心 妳依然無動於衷 我的以為 只是我以為

我以為我的溫柔 能給妳整個宇宙
我以為我能全力 填滿妳感情的缺口
專心陪在妳左右 彌補他一切的錯
也許我太過天真 以為奇蹟會發生

他讓妳紅了眼眶 妳卻還笑著原諒
原來妳早就想好妳要留在誰的身旁
我以為我夠堅強 卻一天天的失望
少給我一點希望 希望就不是奢望

。。。
。。
。

我以為我的溫柔 能給妳整個宇宙
我以為我能全力 填滿妳感情的缺口
專心陪在妳左右 彌補他一切的錯
也許我太過天真 以為奇蹟會發生

他讓妳紅了眼眶 妳卻還笑著原諒
原來妳早就想好妳要留在誰的身旁
我以為我夠堅強 卻輪得那麼絕望
少給我一點希望 希望就不是奢望

Free..

What a day at work. Nothing really stressful or unusual happened.

Just that for a moment, I found all my colleagues in my department disappeared (think they went for a meeting). So I took the chance to snap around abit.

Where's everyone?

My hard work: magazine preview pages I printed, cut and pinned on the board.

I also had some free stuff given by my colleagues, some newly printed magazine issues of Women's Weekly and a Getty Images Yearbook for 2006 (this is the rare one).

Great book. Love it.

The photography book is the best one, it have very nice photographs inside from Getty Images.

Oh Shit.. The First Weekend of the Year is Going to be..

..Boring. Yep. Its Friday, and I feel abit sian..

Cos' I am going to be broke and I doubt I could really go anywhere this coming weekend without my pay still not yet coming in, anyway, the pay is tiap for my future bills also.

Trying to hold my "thickskin-ness" not to borrow money from my parents.

Time for some action to solve my own problems like a man. Time to sacrifice my fun and hopefully I can finish up the Casserole proposal this weekend.

Anyway, I felt today is a more refreshing day than any other day becos' I finally slept early last night.

Need to Rest More.

Tired. That's how my physical and mental condition now.

Haven't been sleeping enough for the past days because I've being on phone calls with women =P

Of course, you can say serve me right, but oh well..

Had a tiring morning doing my very own design layout of an advertorial for The Malaysian Women's Weekly magazine, its an ad for the supermarket called Tesco (Tesco sounds more like a petroleum company's gas station name to me).



Anyway, got the job from my department's Editor-in-Chief, Tara, the caucasian. Lucky we didn't had any communication problems. Even what the other editor briefed wasn't very clear to me yesterday. But at least Tara cleared all the dong-dong I dunno today.

And so I immeidate set to work on the mock-up of this editorial, created some graphics of my own, found all the appropriate stock pictures to match to Tara's marketing concept.

But the editing of the graphics and laying out of the contents took quite some time, I was under pressure to complete everything I got before 2pm. Didn't had lunch until after that. I went for a chop-chop lunch also, so I can go back office clear more work.

Luckily, I did well enough to pass that Tesco job. Heng.

Tara also taught me a thing or two on the work I did and I willingly learn.

~~~~~

After work, I was invited for a short date.

I went to meet my crazy friend Zane after work to head for the library together. I was also too tired to look at books also, I also can't entertain her too much, so most of the time I let her entertain me. Anyway I needed some company after a day of stressful and tiring day that's all.

[Weird Thing: When ever I meet Zane out, we're always wearing extreme contrast colours. She wore almost all black and I wore all pure off-white or khaki.]

There and after, we went to look for a place for her to eat her dinner.. She's a real picky for her dinner gourmet.. I didn't wanted to have my dinner cos' my mum already cooked at home.

But the real reason I didn't want to eat outside is becos' I'm nearing to being broke soon if I spend more. My pay cheque haven't come yet. But blessing, my friend took care of me sharing half of her "fats".. I mean her Subway sandwich.

(More blessing; Zane met her old friend at the Subway who is a writer at another publishing firm. What luck, she's looking for freelance designer. Got her business namecard. Got more kang tou liao.)

That's why I couldn't date people, but people can date me.. I have nothing to offer to anyone now except my intangibles. I am a poor guy!

I feel so blessed to have such another friend, an angel in disguise, just like in Corrinne May's song. Hope God bless her to find her own happiness.

Well, more challenges for me tomorrow. I got to buck up.

Better sleep now..

Work Growing, Me Maturing.

First day of work for the brand new year yesterday.

On the journey back home..

I finally got to do something that fit to my position name as a designer yesterday, designing of course. But not all is smooth, we all learn from our mistakes.

Been learning the trades in Women's Weekly department under Christina, who is one of the two resident deisgners there. She's friendly and helpful enough to teach me the do's and don'ts of deisgning the style of the magazine as well as teaching me the know-hows of using Adobe InDesign.

I know I'm not a quick learner, but I am trying my best to do any major mistakes. I'll have to learn to be a bit more faster, even though recently I'm not really motivated as working is a bit boring to me..

..cos' no one really chats with me there. Hard to find topic with colleagues who married women with kids (different click).

Been hoping to have someone to be my lunch kaki, been having lonely lunch so far and I'm getting sick of window shopping Great World City.

My life is not fast but steady.

I feel I am growing and getting maturity day by day, bit by bit. I know I cannot change my life into the way I want it to be immediately, I'm no magician. But I know I can make a difference by constantly reflecting myself and change.

I don't know what superhero I am. All I know I have many different superhero suits that I can choose to weird. I seem to be looking for some identity.

Well, enough of my blabbling. Time to go to work : )

2007 New Year's Day!

A new day, a new year. Good things seems to be coming.

On the New Year's Day night after the countdown, I am not alone. I was with my west-side friends, Hong Yun (Thomas), Kelvin, Junlong, Chee Wee, Shiling, Huimin, Alvin and not to forget the cute, lady doggy, Xiao Wang.

I knew June was alone for the countdown, so went to chat with her over the phone..

We all had dinner together, spaghetti with two different sauces. Nobody complain, so I guess she passed her culinary skills test and can be housewife for Alvin liao.

The rest of the time is just watch New Year Countdown programme on the telly and play mahjong and poker card games.

* Good Things on New Year's Day - Number 4:

I won "big" money playing mahjong + card games. I was the banker playing for Blackjack and Barracat, and I kept winning and my friends kept complaining. Won some more money playing Showhand Poker.

Played till 4am..

ZzZzzz

~~~~~

On the day on the New Year's Day itself, the activity on was KTV.

* Good Things on New Year's Day - Number 3:

On my way to Paradiz Centre's KBox, a beautiful gigantic rainbow was spotted. A blessing sighted by many of my friends after the rainy days which throughout the last year's Christmas season.

Beautiful indeed.

The attendees for my first KTV session of 2007 were June, Sebest, Alex (later replaced by Sebest's friend),me and BearBear!

Yes, this little fella appeared for my last year's first KTV session too!

The session lasted from 8pm to 4am!!! 8 hours of freezing cold aircon!!!

Heng June and I brought our own hoodie jackets, while the rest suffers the cold :p

Sebestian is really a certfied clown and entertainer.

June's singing was off yesterday. Singing wrong lyrics and a bit "zhao sia". But still sounds nice to me : )

Alex was smoking non-stop to fight the cold.

The session was fun, but I was going to doze off soon. Not because I am bored by the rest of their singing. Its just that its the fourth night I stay out late and I had little sleep on those days too..

~~~~~

* Good Things on New Year's Day - Number 2:

I got a surprise gift yesterday.

Surprised as in the gift was late for Christmas (but well, its considered the 8th day of Christmas yesterday, so it still counts). And its still a surprise to get a gift from her : )

The gift protected by my fav teddy prints all over.

The scratch card.

The prizes I could get.

Aw.. Sh*t! No bingo!

I'm gonna smell great for 2007 for everyone.

The gifts are surprising, interesting, fun and nice indeed.

I like it very much, thank you : )

* Good Thing on New Year's Day - Number 1:

Seeing your pretty face with a new haircut on you, on the first day of 2007 ~ Priceless! 0: )

~~~~~

Now, I'm going to take a nap again. Still not having enough sleep. Tired lah : )